The Swimsuit Edition

I just want to cover my bum in style.

Melvin Sokolsky, Shrimp Da Vinci 1966

It’s that time of year again and I can procrastinate no more. I must humble myself and try to find a swimsuit. For my young readers please bear with me and feel free to let me know if I’m outta line. 

Many a summer I’ve skulked through without a new suit, it’s that hard for me to find one I deem good enough. A couple summers ago I finally relented and bid adieu to my two-piece suits, even the high waisted, boy short versions weren’t doing it for me anymore. A little thing called muffin tops had colonized my mid section. This despite yoga, Pilates, no dairy and walking 5 miles a day. I had no choice but to accept defeat. It’s not a weight thing,  it’s a (late) middle age flab thing.

Now the obstacle to finding a suit is the derrière, though in this case it’s not me.  The bum is hanging in there, no worse for the wear. The swimsuits are at fault here.  Since when did it become okay for the bum to be 50% or more exposed to the elements and eyes?

I vividly remember the first time I saw a girl in full thong glory in public. It was the ‘90’s and we were at the not so swanky beach club in Southampton. A young, possibly Brazilian woman was sporting a thong bikini. Unbeknownst to her she was practically starting a riot. I personally was appalled and this was when I was still technically of public thong wearing age, but it just wasn’t done.

Fast forward to ten years ago; a family beach day with my brother and teen niece who was sporting a bottom that barely covered her bottom. When she got up to head for the waves my brother, the most adoring father in the world, shook his head in resignation and said it’s just weird. I had to agree. How could he fault her when practically all the girls were wearing the same?  For reasons unknown to me my own daughters opted for more modest coverage.  Maybe some of my prudishness rubbed off. 

Then a few summers ago during the most idyllic day on a sailboat with friends off the coast of Majorca, the backside of our host's son’s college friend was more exposed than not. My sensibilities had been hardened to this by now. Enough wine and ennui prevented me from barely raising an eyebrow. This was tested when she would actively point her derrière to the camera every time a picture was snapped. 

 My beef here is not only based on modesty. Aesthetically I find it unflattering regardless of level of fitness. Let’s compare apples to apples in the photos above. I think the photo on the left is infinitely more flattering and sexy. You may say, it's Jane Birkin for God’s sake, however the woman on the right is a professional model with a killer body as well. The way the suit on the left follows the lines of the body by nicely containing her buns and exposing the seductive small of the back, simply looks  more pleasing to the eye.  The suit on the right bisects the buns at the fleshiest point creating an awkward line and fighting the natural curves of the body while hiding the best part of the back. I just find it bad design.

Coverage can be sexy and chic as illustrated in the above photos, mainly from the ‘50’s. Notice the variety of silhouettes and level of details. Today swimsuits have been reduced to a handful of basic silhouettes. Where’s the imagination and innovation? I would wear any one of the above if only they could be found. I wish a swimsuit brand would be bold enough to buck the market trends and do a collection with more structure in sturdier fabrics inspired by vintage swimsuits. 

Am I all alone here? If you're with me on this one dear readers, stick around. Out of my own necessity I’ve done a deep dive into the world of swimsuits and bring to you my finds. It wasn’t easy. There is a general lack of innovation and a lot of repetition of basic styles among swimsuit brands that offer more coverage. Eres is an exception but the cost of admission is high so I’ve included more affordable options as well. Just remember the return rate on swimsuits is even higher than with clothes. If you can, order a few knowing you will likely return most of them.  I give it a totally unscientific return rate of 4 to 1. And always follow my golden rule: would I buy this if I were in a dressing room of a store?

The French company Eres is known for their custom colors, patented Peau Douce fabric and commitment to creating high quality swimwear. Acquired by Chanel in 1996, they command luxury prices though their timeless styles and quality ensures a swimsuit you can enjoy for years to come. Here are my picks, but I encourage you to explore their site, there’s a lot to see and they get points for always showing a back view just by hovering on the photo. Yellow, black, blue, red and green.

Eres eschews trends in favor of designing interesting, timeless styles. With so many good choices I had to add a second page. Though truth be told I wish the leg was cut a little straighter, but better than most. I prefer solid suits however this striped suit I love. Also one shoulder, zip front, snap front and back interest.

Norma Kamali has been making great swimsuits for decades. I’ve owned several over the years and have loved them. Last year I scored a Yves Klein blue one with a retro cut leg. Heaven! She can always be counted on for a few retro styles and does invest in designing unique styles. Case in point the light gray and the dark gray suit above. They remind me of the Claire McCardell suit pictured on the lower left of the vintage collage. I haven’t seen either in person and I’m a tad concerned that the fabric may be thin. I also recommend the black retro halter and black retro sweetheart. Both are available in more colors on the site.

This suit from Toteme has the perfect leg for me. I wanted to buy it last year in black but my size was sold out. Farfetch has it on their site in black, white and gray. Maybe this is my year!

For serious ocean swimming I like either of these from Sea Level, an Australian company specializing in body contouring suits. V-neck and rashguard.

Malia Mills is all about body inclusivity. Though pricey the quality is good. I could still be wearing the bikini I bought a decade ago if I still wore bikinis. Some suits are sold by bra size, which I love. I encourage you to visit the site, there's a lot there on all different body types and a good variety of styles. Here the Valencia maillot. Change of Scenery is a Wolf and Badger brand that caught my interest. And last, I loved the style of this Reformation suit though the back coverage is not great.

I hope there’s something for you and me. Commissions are not made on any of my recommendations. I genuinely struggle in this department and thought you may too. Please leave a comment if you know of other brands that, shall we say, cover this issue. And let me know how your swimsuit search is going.